Grippi Girl

Yes, I used the Care Bear Stare this week at work, and it was not for good. It was for evil, I will admit it. I was irritated and ticked off and it was either the stare or bad things coming out of my mouth. I chose the stare. I felt bad afterwords. I really did. It wasn’t this persons fault. They just happened to deliver the wrong news at the wrong time, during a Friday morning fire fight. I apologized and this person was great about it, we had a good laugh. I am very lucky to work with a great group of people that understand each other.

I will say I love this picture and want to hang it at my desk at work, but think it may be inappropriate. I shall keep it on my phone and pull it up and laugh when needed.

Take care and stay safe out there my friends. Oh, and laugh when needed, laugh often, and sadistically if needed.

How come the first sentence of a blog is the hardest to write? I have the thoughts in my head, but getting that first line out can be so difficult. Is it writers block? Or the fact that I know I shouldn’t start a sentence with the word so.

Things have been going better. Still trying to get the leg back to full function. Muscles are healing slowly, but they are healing. I had been participating in a forum on bonesmart.org. These people have been fantastic support and a good sounding board, but I have decided not to go there any more. I keep reading these stories of how great people are doing after hip replacement surgery. Back to work after 2 weeks, walking without any aids after 10 days. Blah blah blah. I am almost 4 months out and just happy to get out of bed and not fall. I don’t need to be reading all these stories and make myself feel any worse. Failure has never been an option for me and I don’t like not being where I thought I would. I know, slow and steady wins the race, but I just want to finish and get to the next one

So, here we are again. (see that, I started the sentence with so) Going through the motions and getting things done. I will keep moving forward because that is what I do. Make the best of the hand you are dealt and play the player not the cards.

Take care and be safe out there my friends.

Where to even begin. The last few months have been a lot harder than I thought they would be. I am glad I had my surgery, just thought recovery would of been better than it is. I have never had this much muscle and soft tissue pain after a surgery before. I don’t want to be all whiney and woe is me. That is why I haven’t blogged.

One thing I will say is I really understand that when you are in constant pain that it plays with your mind. Even before surgery I was very active and was able to do a lot of things. Now I can’t walk around the block with out a cane. I am the type of person who likes to get things accomplished. I have not accomplished anything in some while. I thought when I went back to work it would help. It didn’t. I thought I could jump right back in and pick up right were I left off. Just made me feel more off of my game. Brain doesn’t function at the speed I need it to. My brain is even out of shape.

So, I feel lost, confused, disengaged. I have had no inspiration to write. Today’s blog came from our wonderful Jackie Wolven who thought of me and made me smile. First time in a while it was a true smile. She wanted to know how I am really doing. Well, I am on my way and I will be okay. Just not the path I thought I was going to take, but this must be the path I was meant to.

I think I need a dose of the ocean, or of a Great Lake. I always feel better with sand between my toes.

So take care and be safe out there everyone. Hopefully I won’t be gone that long this time.

So here I am a week after surgery. Can’t believe a week ago about this time I was finally getting out of recovery. Surgery took an hour longer than expected and I had lost a good amount of blood. I ended up staying in recovery longer due to elevated heart rate. The next day I had to get a couple pints of blood and felt much better and my heart rate went down. You should of seen the nurses in recovery when I woke up. All I wanted was to see my husband and they kept saying no visitors are aloud in recovery, and I kept demanding. All I wanted was for him to hold my hand. Finally one of the nurses caved and let him come in. Thank you to her, having him there just made me feel better.

For the last week I have been resting, icing and elevating my leg. That is the golden rule. There have been a few days where I have felt good, and a few days when I have felt…. well miserable. It’s like an emotional roller coaster. One minute I am feeling fine and the next I am crying for no reason. The swelling in my thigh and knee has been pretty intense and along with that comes muscle spasms. Pain medication helps for about an hour or so after I take it, then it is just pushing through until the next serving of meds. I know the pain will go away and it will be better in a month. Let’s just hope my family can put up with me for that long.

I had my first physical therapy (PT) visit today. Rob is my PT. I remember being at Shriner’s hospital as a kid and we would call them physical terrorists. That still holds true today. First thing he had me do was get on a NuStep machine. I asked him if he was crazy. I mean come on, I can’t lift my leg and you want me to what????? I did it though. Most of the exercises are to strengthen my quad muscles. I really thought my leg would be much stronger than it is, but he said due to the extra work done during surgery it will be weaker. He pushed me through the exercises and now I am exhausted and icing away.

Above is a picture of my walker. Yes I am the old lady with the walker and two cats, and a dog. I have been a little nervous to go anywhere with it. I know I shouldn’t worry about what other people think. Who cares right? It’s bad enough that the other patients at the clinic where looking at me weird for using a walker, imagine the looks I would get at the store. I am hoping by next week I can switch to a cane and then I can go out into public again.

So take care out there and keep each other safe.

Merry Christmas

Well it’s day four after surgery. I came home from hospital yesterday, and it was the first night in my own bed. Pain medicine seems to be working, but the swelling is what hurts that most. I have discovered the best ice packs in the world, bagged frozen veggies.

My husband has been fantastic, doing everything he can for me. Ryan is funny. He doesn’t let me walk anywhere without him by my side. He wants to stay home from school to help take care of me. When Rob took him to school today he left instructions for his daddy on how to take care of me. He is going to make some girl a great husband someday. It makes me happy to see what a great little man we are raising.

And then there is my puppy who won’t leave my side. He just snuggles and tries not to get to close. He is normally like a little tank running around, but he has been so gentle around me.

Everything seems to be an emotional roller coaster right now and I am sure we will get through it. Today is a day I think that I will just sit here and cry. But that’s okay, and I am sure there will be more. I am thankful for all of my friends and family that are being so patient with me. I know when the healing process is over this will be one of the best things I have ever done, just right now I am not so sure.

I will continue to maneuver with my old lady walker as much as I can. Physical therapy starts on Monday and that will be when the hard work starts. This week my job is to just rest and heal. I never thought putting on a pair of socks would be so hard, and give such satisfaction when completed.

So take care and be safe out there, Happy Holidays to all!!

‘Twas the night before Surgery
and all through the house
I was preparing
And so was my spouse.

Okay I am no poet. Don’t think I could rewrite the whole poem even though it is one of my favorites. I think I have just about everything ready for tomorrow. I am very nervous and excited at the same time. Anxious. It’s hard to explain how I feel. I know this surgery is the right thing to do, but I am scared out of my wits. I am hoping this surgery changes a lot of things in my life. I want to be more active and do all the fun things that I have been missing out on. Not to mention not being in pain everyday. I have lived with this my whole life, so not being in daily pain will be different. Good different.

We explained to Ryan about the surgery. He understands but says he’s a little scared. He wanted to take the day off school to be at the hospital with us all day. I told him he would have a lot more fun at school then at the hospital. Rob is going to bring him in the evening tomorrow to visit, if I am up to it.

So I sit here counting down the hours. I have to be at the hospital at 7 a.m., and surgery is scheduled for 9:30 a.m. I am going to try to do weekly updates depending on how I feel.

So take care and be safe out there. Happy Holidays.

Well as usual my journey seems to like to take detours. This one I knew was coming someday, and I think I am very glad it is here. On Dec. 10 I am having my right hip replaced. I am as nervous as all get out, don’t get me wrong, but looking forward to it in the long run. Everything I read and everyone I talk to tells me how much better I will feel when it’s all done with.

All I know is that I just want to be able to have a normal activity level without the pain. So 2 weeks before Christmas, one day before my birthday I will go in to have this done. I have always said I wanted to wait until I was 40, well I miss that by a day. I get to spend my birthday in the hospital. And that’s ok, it will be like being at a spa. Room service and pain medication. What else could you ask for? Think they will let me wear a tiara all day? Or have a beer?

This will be quite the adventure for me. My hubby is taking 2 weeks off work to take care of me and I am excited about that. He will be my rock as usual. I don’t know what I would do without him. Ryan has every thing worked out on how I can be better by Christmas, cuz Santa would want it that way.

So here is to my boys and their dedication to taking care of me. I love them more than anything and can’t wait for our first bike ride after the old creaky hip, is replaced and like new again. Maybe I will even surprise them with something more adventurous. Ideas anyone?

So be safe out there and take care. Who knows some of my upcoming posts may be very entertaining if I’m medicated. Hehehehehe

Today was a roller coaster emotion day. We laid my grandma, Doris M. Preston Smock to rest. After 86 years my grandma has gone to heaven to be with my grandpa. This women is one of the most amazing women I have ever known.

She lived her life in such a true way. She never compromised her principles or what she believed in. She was stubborn, strict and was in charge. She was also caring compassionate, giving and selfless. She was the first female member of the Lions legion, and was dedicated to giving to others. She always spoke her mind and put others before her. Coming from a large family, she was the matriarch. She was the leader and what held us together.

If I inherited or learned anything from her it was to speak your mind and opinions, but be respectful at the same time. She lived her life true, in the best form.

She volunteered at the American Cancer Society, ran the community fair board, volunteered to work elections, was part of the American Legion and was a key personality in our small community of 1500 people. There are so many things she was involved in I couldn’t list them all. She impacted so many lives and was a wonderful lady.

Today we said goodbye, but remembered. We will always remember. From the great family arguments to the happy Easter egg hunts. That was the best, those Easter egg hunts. Even if as we got older we spied to see where the eggs with the money were hidden. Hehehe.

Goodbye Grandma I love you and will always miss you, but I am glad you are whole again and with those that passed before you. Give grandpa a hug and say hi to Aunt Wendy.

Take care and be safe out there. If you still have your grandma call her now, tell her you love her and what an impact she has had on you.